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6 Things Calm Couples Have Sorted
Is it really normal and healthy to fight?
Couples fight. We all know that’s normal, even healthy, right? But is it possible for a relationship to be relaxed and easy too? What if the next time you were in a couple you felt calm 90% of the time.
I got married last November for the second time. One of the ways I knew he was my “one” was how different this relationship feels. Even after years of knowing each other, our relationship is easy. So easy it feels strange, if I’m honest. After years full of drama and conflict in my first marriage it feels odd to be so calm in a relationship.
In my twenties, I didn’t question the struggles of my marriage. I assumed weekly fights were normal. Apparently I’m not the only one. One survey found 44% of married couples hold the same beliefs as I did. In the survey couples said that fighting more than once a week helped to keep their relationship healthy and productive.
Growing up, I wasn’t modelled a conflict-filled marriage by my parents — my stepmom and dad have a calm, happy relationship — but that seemed the exception rather than the rule. I knew plenty of married couples who fought regularly. Couple in movies always fought too and worked it out — that was all part of the deal, right?
