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I Played “Mind Games” When I Started Dating My Partner
But there are better ways to get what you want
I lean against the kitchen bench waiting for the jug to boil and pick up my phone for the fifteenth time that morning. This time I’m rewarded. Ben’s text greets me as I tap the screen.
Thinking of you. Hope you’re having a nice morning xx. I read it twice, excitement rising in my stomach. He’s added kisses. That’s a bit cute.
I start to text back but the “rules of the game” nag at me. Don’t text first; don’t reply instantly. They’re the rules I’ve settled on, but now doubt creeps in. Is it really the right way to approach this new relationship? I freeze, staring at my phone as if Siri might give me the answer.
Biting my lip, I put the phone down without replying and pour my coffee instead.
I always hated games in dating. They’re manipulative, dishonest, and I felt they got in the way of a real connection. Mind games were for players and teases. But I felt lost and needed to do something new.
My past relationship pattern was obvious and not heading me in a great direction: I put in 110%. I was supportive. I was attentive. I predicted their needs…
And I chased after what I wanted. (If I’m honest, I was clingy and desperate…
