My Wedding’s Postponed but I’m Grateful

All the things we’re missing feel more precious now

Photo by Scott Webb on Unsplash

I wanted to elope. This is my second wedding and I couldn’t be bothered with all that fuss and stress and expense this time around. My fiance also doesn’t like a lot of fuss but, for me, even our small wedding plans felt too much.

Despite the hype of being your best day ever, the reality is weddings aren’t easy. Especially for socially anxious introverts, like me.

Social anxiety left over from my twenties still lurks in the shadows. Mostly I keep it in the background now, but large parties are still difficult. Especially large parties that focused on me.

There would still be 40 people, afternoon tea, photos, relatives I don’t know well, and, somehow, I agreed to speeches — cringe.

And then there’s the vows.

I’m a writer but that doesn’t mean it’s any easier to stand up and spout soppy deeply personal prose in front of everyone. Who loves public speaking, right? Okay, some of you do (just accept that you’re a fortunate freak of nature; the rest of us are terrified by it.)

A month ago, sitting next to my fiance at his sister’s large elaborate wedding, I whispered, “Are you sure you don’t want to elope?” We were in the 6-week countdown, but he…